Your Inner Child Is Never Lost

 

I was speaking with one of my professional athletes during an intense session in which we were attempting to uncover the seeds of his disappointments with his life.

During a particularly sensitive moment during the session the air was thick with an awkward silence. He put his hands on his knees and looked at the floor. And he said, “Doc, I never felt like I had a childhood.”

I understood immediately what he meant. This is an issue that I have come across in my own life, raising two boys who are completely immersed in efforts toward being professional golfers.

It happens with professional athletes, actors, musicians, and all manner of talented artists.

The problem is clear. But what is the solution?

The solution is to explore with greater detail the TRUTH behind this issue.

I told this athlete, Your childhood may be gone. But your inner child sits waiting for you.

To which he replied, “What do you mean?”

When an individual experiences a loss of childhood, the word “childhood” is a euphemism for something much more fundamental and beautiful.

“Childhood” is a euphemism for:

Freedom.

Wild Abandon.

Exploration.

Mystery.

Wonder.

Bliss.

What the person is saying is that they were never allowed to experience this NECTAR of childhood. For they were always in the position of STRATEGIZING and STRIVING for career success.

They were made to assume and prioritize the aspirations of adults, rather than the amorphous and playful nature of childhood.

I will provide for you a taste of the conversation that ensued.

I told my athlete, “Not only did you lose your childhood years ago. You continue to lose it everyday of your life.”

“How so, Doc?”

“You continue to turn your back on that which children hold dear. Though you are a professional athlete, freedom and play are nowhere to be found.”

“I play in tournaments every week, Doc!”

“You COMPETE in tournaments every week, my friend. You don’t PLAY in them. I haven’t seen you PLAY in months.”

“So tell me how to play,” he said.

“My point exactly. Would a child ever ask someone ‘HOW TO PLAY’?

He sat quiet for a moment.

I continued, “For as long as you subscribe to the ideals of Achievement and Awards and Competition, you will forever live imprisoned by them. I understand that your advisors and your coaches have held you close to these ideals. But they are strangling you. For these are the ideals of ADULTS. They are not the IDEALS of children.”

He replied, “But how will I progress in my career without these ideals?”

“My dear friend, how will you progress WITH THEM?”

“Okay, I’m listening. Tell me more,” he said.

“Do you know why children have so much energy?” I asked.

“No.”

“Because they are not burdened by such ideals. They are not WEIGHED DOWN by NEEDS for progress and success and accolades. To them it is ALL PLAY. Life is PLAY. Games are PLAY. Play, play, play. Come what may. And because they are not burdened by THOUGHT, they have an enormous amount of energy available to them.”

“I never thought of it that way,” he said.

“Your inner child has been waiting for you for decades. You will experience him when you play. When you throw your life to wild abandon. When you allow your talent FREE REIGN. Without attempting to manipulate and control it. And an athlete or an artist who allows his talent FREE REIGN will achieve all the glories and accolades of the world, without the psychological burdens.”

To all athletes and artists, I make this decree:

Your inner child hasn’t gone anywhere.

He sits waiting.

He is starving for your attention.

He looks for you each day, hoping that today will be the day that you turn your gaze in his direction.

When you play, you will experience him.

When you hold your “career” loose and your freedom TIGHT, you will experience him.

When you stand on stage before millions and smile a genuine smile, you will experience him.

And the more you experience him, the more you will become him.

It is a peculiar state of human existence that children are in a hurry to become adults. And adults would give anything for one more day of childhood.

But when one experiences his inner child, he understands that though he may have grown taller than him, he never truly grew AWAY from him.

Embrace him and experience him and you will never long for childhood again.

And your life will become the free and playful benediction that it was meant to be.

Dr. Gupta travels the world working with True Seekers. His clientele consists of professional athletes, executives, and celebrities. He helps them become The God Of Their Own Life.

Kapil@KapilGuptaMD.com